What Not To Do While You're In The Middle Ages is an American animated web miniseries. The series centered on the misadventures of in the surreal version of the medieval times.


What could possibly go wrong in the medieval times? Well...everything.


The setting takes place in the fictional kingdom of Etheridge during the Middle Ages. It centers on a group of The show's humor has a fairly campy and lighthearted take on the genre, often makes fun of itself, and rarely seems to take itself seriously as it parodies and uses references from famous fantasy movies(The Lord of the Rings, Monty Python and the Holy Grail and Harry Potter, etc).



Wesley-Ron's childhood friend.

Maurice- a young wizard who accompanies Ron

Dove- Penelope's best friend and lady in waiting.

Penelope StormButt- the princess of Etheridge

a hobbit who speaks in shakespearean.

Gunter- a mute hobbit who is unable to talk due to his inability to utilize his tongue. He can only communicates with facial expressions, charades and sign language.

Timmy- a bard who enjoys playing his lyre and singing.

who suffers from OCD.

Jacques -Though he can understand English, he always speaks French with subtitles. He spoke English in a few episodes in order for everyone to understand him better.


  • Your Highness, we've found a witch! May we have permission to burn her?

Wesley's Mother:I'm not a witch! i'm your wife, dumbass!

Wesley's Father:Oh yeah...I forgot about that. Sorry.

:Wesley's Mother:Now like i said, i'm not a witch!

But you look like one!

Wesley's Mother:That's because they dressed me up like a halloween decoration! And this isn't my actual facial skin color! (wipes the makeup off her face) It's just makeup for fuck sake!


She had turned me into a toad!

What?! I've been worse!

No, you don't, You make her take the ice bucket challenge! Water makes witches melt. Therefore, if she melts, she is a witch.


Hey, i have a better idea! Let's burn the witch instead!

There are ways of telling she's a witch.

There are?

Do they hurt? Do they bleed?

The villagers looked at each other in confusion before looking back at

So, what made you so sure that this woman is a witch?

Okay fine, we were bored and we had nothing else to do. So, we decided to come with an idea to execute some random person to relieve our boredom.

So...You did all of this just because you were bored? (the villagers nodded their heads again)Well, do whatever floats your witch.

And that folks is the American justice system in a nutshell.

  • Now everyone, let's sing the annual burning the witch song!

Everyone began holding hands before singing Alicia Keys-Girl On Fire

This girl is on fire

This girl is on fire

She's walking on fire

  • But you're using coconuts! Eh...were...

So? We've ridden since the white flaky stuff covered the land! We've come from-

Where'dya get the coconuts? I need to life stuff...coconuts would be good...

We conquered them!

Conquered them? But coconuts are tropical!

  • Did you know that a squirrel once bit my cousin in the toe.


Shut up!


  • Most of us are gay!

Talk about a reality check!

Say that again?

Thee must understandth, we art homosexuals.

You're kidding.

Oh come on, Seven males all living together without women interfering.

  • Would you just eat me already! I'm not a toothpick!
  • So what happened is that even the cutest of creatures can be deadly and bloodthirsty...I like this quest already!
  • Back, you furry harbinger of hell! I have...a carrot and i'm not afraid to use it!

See guys...Problem solved.

  • It's already confirmed that i'm a natural born leader.

You know what else has been confirmed. You're a natural born idiot.

  • Look Penelope. It all started with a woman gets under the man. The man opens the hole and puts his sausage between her hotdog bun.

No dad! Not that question!

  • No Dove. I'm gonna be queen of the whole fucking kingdom. ran towards an open window and screams YOU HEAR THAT ETHERIDGE?! AS SOON AS I BECOME QUEEN, I'M GONNA RULE YOUR ASS LIKE A PRO ON STEROIDS!
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