Fanon Wiki

Read the Wiki Policy before editing!

Welcome to the Fanon Wiki! Before you create any articles, you MUST read the Wiki Policy. You MUST be sure to always add Categories to your articles, and properly name all images you upload, or they will be deleted with consequences. If you have any questions, contact Chris6d or another Staff Member. Happy editing!

READ MORE

Fanon Wiki
No edit summary
Tag: Visual edit
No edit summary
Tag: Visual edit
Line 283: Line 283:
   
 
'''Script'''
 
'''Script'''
  +
  +
Jace Bellewaters: (narrating)My name is Jace Bellewaters. I'm eighteen years old and i'm from Vermont. My mother is a widow because my father dies when i was only eleven because a drunk driver caused my dad to drove himself into a river. Mom got a job teaching college students at New York University. Sure, you could say i'm proud of her. It just happened all of a sudden and the next thing you know, she got her dream job, forced me, my twelve year old brother Edgar, and our golden retriever Shadow into the car and started driving. She has this dream that we'll be able to start over. To have a new life somewhere far from our old home. I'm sure mom means well, but her heart just isn't into it. A new house, a new city, a new school, new everything. Part of me thinks that we won't be able to handle it, but i told myself otherwise before i give in to my better judgement. Besides, after dad died, mom had been obsessed with the idea of leaving Vermont. We never left until now because we never had the money.
  +
  +
Here we are.
  +
  +
Jace: Must be from the previous owners.
   
 
Guys! Why the long faces? We're at our new home!
 
Guys! Why the long faces? We're at our new home!
   
What are you talking about? This place will never be our home.
+
Jace Bellewaters:(mumbled)What are you talking about? This place will never be our home.
   
 
Find the key.
 
Find the key.
Line 295: Line 301:
   
 
Jace:Hello?
 
Jace:Hello?
  +
  +
No answer
   
 
Jace:Hello?
 
Jace:Hello?
  +
  +
Again, no answer.
   
 
Edgar:Who are you talking to?
 
Edgar:Who are you talking to?
Line 306: Line 316:
 
Jace:Why?
 
Jace:Why?
   
Because i'm the parent and i said so.
+
(sternly)Because i'm the parent and i said so.
   
 
Edgar? Where are you?
 
Edgar? Where are you?
Line 317: Line 327:
   
 
My new boss is taking us out to eat. You will be on your best behavior, young lady.
 
My new boss is taking us out to eat. You will be on your best behavior, young lady.
  +
  +
That's weird. Loads of plugs and no electricity.
   
 
Jace! Ready yet?
 
Jace! Ready yet?
   
 
Jace:I have to fix my hair!
 
Jace:I have to fix my hair!
  +
  +
There's no time for that! We have to leave!
   
 
Jace: 12th grade, sir.
 
Jace: 12th grade, sir.
   
 
My, my. You are quite the young lady, then.
 
My, my. You are quite the young lady, then.
  +
  +
Yes sir. Six o'clock sounds great, Ok Mr. Wilkerson, i'll see you tonight.
  +
  +
Why are you meeting Mr.Wilkerson again? You just saw him last night.
  +
  +
It's none of your business. We have certain things to discuss about the job. You know, work hours and things like that. All you alright? You took quite a fall last night.
  +
  +
I'm alright, Mom.
  +
  +
So tonight, I'll need you to keep an eye on Edgar and Shadow.
  +
  +
Fine.
   
 
JACE FRANCINE BELLAWATERS! Where the heck have you been?! Strolling around , i suppose! You'll make me late, you know1
 
JACE FRANCINE BELLAWATERS! Where the heck have you been?! Strolling around , i suppose! You'll make me late, you know1
Line 395: Line 421:
   
 
Ok. Not your average Harry Potter. (reads the book)
 
Ok. Not your average Harry Potter. (reads the book)
  +
  +
(shouted)Edgar, put that down!
  +
  +
What's Fayble?
  +
  +
(shouted)Nothing! Just...give it back!
  +
  +
Mom?
  +
  +
What?
  +
  +
Do you miss dad?
  +
  +
Come and sit, Jace. David was...really interesting. He was one of those care free people. Didn't take life seriously, always living in the moment. I remember when we first met, I was skiing during the holidays in my second year of college. He was my ski instructor. He proposed to me on a hot air balloon. Yes, he was one to take risks, but i loved him. When we had you, it was just perfect. We both had great jobs, we were paying our bills, we had a nice house and we vacationed every year. Then, when we had Edgar, your dad just...let himself go. He jumped from job to job, started smoking and drinking, he wouldn't come back until the next morning. And then he got himself killed! I knew it was only a matter of time before something happened.
  +
  +
(yells)The food!
   
 
Hi there.
 
Hi there.
Line 435: Line 477:
   
 
Bless you, your majesty. Goodbye and good luck.
 
Bless you, your majesty. Goodbye and good luck.
  +
  +
HIYA JACE!
  +
  +
So, what did you do today, Jace?
  +
  +
Nothing special.
  +
  +
Jace, get in here now!
  +
  +
Where are you?
  +
  +
In my room!
  +
  +
Why is this unlocked? When i tried to open it last night, it was locked. Explain yourself.
  +
  +
I swear, i have no idea.
  +
  +
I'm going to bed.
  +
  +
Why this early?
  +
  +
My first day at work is tomorrow. I have to teach a class at seven in the morning. That means you're in charge of keeping an eye on Edgar and Shadow. Shadow has some medicine to take in the morning.
   
 
Suddenly, Jace began to wake up to see the dwarves staring at her then she began to scream.The dwarves screamed. Jace screamed. The dwarves screamed. Jace screamed. The seven dwarves finally looked at one another.
 
Suddenly, Jace began to wake up to see the dwarves staring at her then she began to scream.The dwarves screamed. Jace screamed. The dwarves screamed. Jace screamed. The seven dwarves finally looked at one another.

Revision as of 07:53, 3 July 2018

Fayble is an upcoming American-Canadian 3D computer animated fantasy adventure comedy film. It stars the voices of Debby Ryan, Katy Perry, Jamie Chung, Garrett Clayton, Seth Green, James Franco, Nick Kroll, Kevin McDonald, Dave Foley, Jason Segel, Tobey Maguire, Fran Drescher, Coco Jones, Taylor Swift and Jane Lynch.

Taglines: From the creator of Star Guardians Unite!

The fairy tales you people known and loved is about to get faybled!

Prepare to get faybled!

Summary

Jace Bellewaters, a 16 year old girl gets magically transported into Fayble, a world where Fairy Tales exist. When she learns that their world is in grave danger, she discovers that she is the key to Fayble's survival. Now, she has to defeat an evil queen and teams up with several fairy tale characters to fight the evil queen and save the land.

Cast

Debby Ryan as Jace Bellewaters, the main protagonist of the film.

Katy Perry as Goldilocks, the titular character from the tale 'Goldilocks and the Three Bears'.

Jamie Chung as Snow White Charming, the titular character from the tale 'Snow White'.

Garrett Clayton as Jack Spriggins, the titular character from the tale 'Jack and the Beanstalk' .

Seth Green as Prince Atticus Charming, one of the dwarves from the tale 'Snow White'.

Patrick Warburton as Prince Aron Charming, one of the dwarves from the tale "Snow White".

Spencer Boldman as Prince Justin Charming, one of the dwarves from the tale "Snow White".

Kevin McDonald as Prince Gerald Charming, one of the dwarves from the tale "Snow White".

Dave Foley as Prince Elrond Charming, one of the dwarves from the tale "Snow White".

Bill Hader as Prince Cameron Charming, one of the dwarves from the tale 'Snow White'.

Jason Segel as Prince Kent Charming, one of the dwarves from the tale 'Snow White'.

Taylor Swift as Cinderella, the titular character from the tale "Cinderella". Unlike the original Cinderella, she is somewhat uninterested in marrying Prince Charming.

Tobey Maguire as Prince Charming, the prince from the "Cinderella" story.

Fran Drescher as

Jane Lynch as Queen Grimhilde, the main antagonist from the "Snow White" story and the main antagonist of the film. She is feared by everyone and threatens to erase their story if they don't do what she says.

Coco Jonas as Red Riding Hood, the titular character from the tale 'Little Red Riding Hood' and is Jack's love interest.

Cuba Gooding Jr. as The Magic Mirror, the mystical object from the "Snow White" story.

Ice Cube as The Big, Bad Wolf

Whoopi Goldberg as Red Riding Hood's Grandmother

Kate Higgins as Adriana, one of Cinderella's stepsisters from the "Cinderella" story.

Kath Soucie as Linda, one of Cinderella's stepsisters from the "Cinderella" story.

Grey Griffin as Dorienne, Cinderella's stepmother from the "Cinderella" story.

Lex Lang

Tara Strong as Edgar Bellewaters, Jace's younger brother.

Teri Hatcher as , Jace's widowed mother.

Quotes

  • Prince Elrond Charming:Cuz, will you please stop looking at us like that.

Prince Charming: Where's the rest of you?

  • Who is it?

Your granddaughter.

Which one?

The one in the red hood.

Oh! Come in!

(yells)Get out of here! (climbs out of bed and grabbed a broom) Shoo! Shoo!

Woman, do i look like a fly to you?

  • Prince Charming: Did i ever tell you that i've got a thing for brunettes?

Prince Atticus, Prince Aron and Jack ruffles their hair with a confused look

Snow White:Brunettes are for girls, idiots.

Prince Atticus, Prince Aron and Jack:Oh okay. I-I...that was embarrassing.

  • Jace Bellewaters:What are you?

Prince Cameron Charming:We're Elves.

Jace Bellewaters:You're not elves. Elves aren't three feet tall, they're usually closer to seven. The only short elves i've heard of only work for Father Christmas, but they wouldn't survive here, it's much too warm.

Prince Gerald Charming:Maybe we took off our coats, eh? Never thought of that, did ye?

Prince Atticus:Yeah, lay it off, Ger. She knows we ain't no Elf punks. (turned to Jace, looking very apologetically) Sorry, about my younger brother's behavior.

  • Cinderella:What's your whole name?

Prince Charming: Boy-Ar-Dee

  • Hello, dearie.

Ma'am, I don't mean to be rude but why are you in my home?

I'm your fairy godmother, my dear. Now, it is time for you to be beautiful. so that you may go to the ball and have the Prince fall in love with you.

Cinderella:Why would i want that?

So that you may marry the Prince and live happily ever after.

Cinderella stood up and walked up to the woman. She grabbed the wand and hit the fairy on the head with it.

Cinderella:Now listen here, for i will only say this once. I will make my own way in life and if the Prince decides to love me, it will be as a result of who i am, not because i'm beautiful. I find your beliefs to be sexist and quite offensive. I apologize for my rudeness, but i think you should leave.

Fairy Godmother:Fine then. disappeared

She switched the Tv off in disgust and went to bed.

  • What?

Cinderella:I'm sorry, but i find that extremely amusing. i mean, he says that he loves woman, yet he can't even know what she looks like, if he has to determine who she is by her shoe size! How much of an idiot can he be? He should go on Idiots of : The Game Show.

You're just jealous!

Cinderella:Of whom? His girlfriend? I don't think so I pity her. I only hope they've got some deodorant for that shoe after everyone tried it on...

  • Prince Charming:Will you marry me?

Cinderella:No!

Prince Charming:Why not?

Cinderella:Think about it, Do i look like that girl you danced with on Saturday night?

Prince Charming:But... the shoe fits you. That means we're getting married.

  • Jace, Since you are from reality... you might break this fairytale. Reality and fantasy don't mix.
  • Prince Charming: (shouted) WE ARE A TEAM! WE NEED TO STAND BY EACH OTHER AND FIGHT OUR HARDEST AND TOUGHEST! WE MIGHT BE WEAK BUT TOGETHER, WE ARE A TEAM! TEAM FAIRYTALE!
  • Why does she call me by that stupid name? My name is Ella not Cinderella, geez.

Dorienne: What on earth did you do with these potato slices?These potato slices are charred and there aren't enough of them.

Cinderella:Wait, there aren't enough? I used the rest of the potatoes I put them in the oven so they weren't touching each other, exactly like you said They stayed in the oven for twenty minutes, just like you ordered

Dorienne: You're supposed to make twice this many, that's why they're burnt.

Cinderella:What do you want me to do about it?

Dorienne: Well, it's a bit late for you to make more. But next time, there's no excuse.

Cinderella:I figured as much.

Dorienne: What was that, Cindy?

Cinderella:Yes, ma'am.

  • Linda:Ugh, don't you ever take a shower?

Cinderella:Yeah, whenever you freaks let me.

Dorienne: What did you just say?

Cinderella:I said i can only take a shower when you freaks let me.

Dorienne: That's what i thought. (slaps her across the face)

Cinderella:(rubs her red, swollen cheek)Jeez, sorry.

  • We saw him in the street!

He was from the Charming Family, wasn't he!

The carriage had the crest!

What did he say?

As the sisters played tug of war on the envelope, Cinderella watched in mild amusement.

Cinderella:Just open it, already!

Both of the sisters sneered.

Adriana:Why should you care?

Cinderella:It is addressed to the residents of every kingdom in this land.

Both of the sisters laughed harshly.

Linda:Well you don't count. What could he possibly want with a scrawny girl like you? Well, perhaps you could shine his shoes.

As Adriana barked with laughter, Linda finally opened it up, slipping a beautiful piece of parchment out. Both girls read it silently, taking quite some time to do so and Cinderella watched their faces light up as the seconds passed.

Adriana/Linda:( excitedly shouted in unison)A BALL! We've been invited to a ball! The prince's twenty-first birthday! HE'S LOOKING FOR A WIFE!

  • Jack Spriggins: Debonair, suave, intelligent, romantic, gentile, chivalrous and gallant. What have you to say for that?

Prince Charming:It's true. Did you know i can also boil water faster than any man alive? And that i have no trouble distinguishing between black and navy blue?

Jack Spriggins: Are you a victim of chronic depression?

Prince Charming:Yes, i would have to agree with that.

Jack Spriggins: Can you tell me why you agree?

Prince Charming:Because i fell so stressed out lately. Everyone has these demands. I fought 38 dragons in the past month and rescued 43 princesses, all with no zits or perspiration. I just can't deal with this anymore!(bursts into sobs and covers his face with both of his hands)

Jack Spriggins: Why can't you sweat?

Prince Charming:Because the ladies don't like it and i have to be perfect.

Jack Spriggins:No one has to be perfect...

Prince Charming:I do! I'm Prince Charming!

Jack Spriggins: Let's work with the dragon issue first. How many did you say?

Prince Charming:Thirty eight, in the last month.

  • Prince Charming:I had a nervous breakdown.

Jack Spriggins: Would you like to tell me about it?

Prince Charming:I don't think you want to hear.

Jack Spriggins: Of course i want to hear, I'm your childhood buddy!

Prince Charming:It involves a hedgehog and a gallon of Hawaiian Punch.

Jack Spriggins: Well, What about the ladies? How go things in that department?

Prince Charming:Horrible! As soon as i rescue one from her tower and another who needs to be kissed, it's a nightmare! I can't take it anymore! And they all want to marry me! Every last one of them begs me to stay and marry them! I'm only one man!

Jack Spriggins: And i suppose that rescuing princesses is part of your job as well?

Prince Charming:Sadly yes.

Jack Spriggins: Out of curiosity, do you get to kiss them after you've saved them from the fiery pits of doom?

Prince Charming:Oh yes, it's one of the pecks. lowers his voice I'm actually quite good.

Jack Spriggins: I'll take your word for it. Well, i have a little homework assignment for you. I want you to take the week off. Don't fight any dragons, don't rescue princesses. The only thing i want you to do is chill and scope out women.

Prince Charming:Scope out women?

Jack Spriggins: Yes, i want you to find a woman you like and woo her. Wine and dine, send flowers, the whole she-bang. Just one though. I don't want you taxing yourself.

Prince Charming:Ok.

Red Riding Hood:Is it going to be like this from now on?

Jack Spriggins: I hope not, although he did have a very tight butt.

  • Goldilocks: And they have a mirror!

Snow White:WAIT! How the heck did they know where we are? Unless the mirror has a GPS system on it?

Scene fades to flashback of how they find them.

The Magic Mirror:Turn right.

This way men! (turns right)

The Magic Mirror:You are at your destination.

No we're not! This stupid thing must be broken This thing could only show half of the way How is this so magical if-

The Magic Mirror:Look in the distance, stupid. (looks up and sees the in the distance) Why? You need directions to go straight? Idiot.

Flashback fades off.

  • Adriana: How do i look?

Linda:You look wonderful.

Cinderella:(dryly)Yes and all you need now for the perfect ice cream sundae look is to have a little umbrella sticking out of your head.

Adriana: No one asked you, Cindy.

  • Prince Charming:You dare mock my efforts, servant girl?

Dorienne: Your highness, I am dreadfully sorry for this street rat's behavior, I assure you she will be severely punished.

Prince Charming:I've-I think i've seen you somewhere...

Cinderella:NOOOOOOO!

Wha-? Cinderella stomped on his foot as hard as she could and made a break for the doorWait Please I know you from somewhere, I just know it

Cinderella:(screams)NEVER! YOU WON'T GET ME WITHOUT A FIGHT!

  • I'm looking for a girl with a 2 inch waist, covered with cinders, long and gangly.

But your highness,

But i hired you to help me find her so i can her my queen!

Yes, but i can't just make a girl out of thin air. I mean, you've got the fat ones, you've got the skinny ones and you've got the top heavy ones.

Stupid peasant, I should have him burned for that. If only Mother would let me.

Prince Charming:Oh... oh yeah?! Get back out here and i'll -(the door cracked open) OH GOD! NO! I'M SORRY! PLEASE DON'T HURT ME!

Prince Charming:No, i didn't get your apples. The owner was a complete- (the door cracked open)...DELIGHT. (the door slammed shut)...Get in the shed.(his horse looked at him) Don't argue. (his horse continued to look at him) JUST GET IN THE SHED!

Script

Jace Bellewaters: (narrating)My name is Jace Bellewaters. I'm eighteen years old and i'm from Vermont. My mother is a widow because my father dies when i was only eleven because a drunk driver caused my dad to drove himself into a river. Mom got a job teaching college students at New York University. Sure, you could say i'm proud of her. It just happened all of a sudden and the next thing you know, she got her dream job, forced me, my twelve year old brother Edgar, and our golden retriever Shadow into the car and started driving. She has this dream that we'll be able to start over. To have a new life somewhere far from our old home. I'm sure mom means well, but her heart just isn't into it. A new house, a new city, a new school, new everything. Part of me thinks that we won't be able to handle it, but i told myself otherwise before i give in to my better judgement. Besides, after dad died, mom had been obsessed with the idea of leaving Vermont. We never left until now because we never had the money.

Here we are.

Jace: Must be from the previous owners.

Guys! Why the long faces? We're at our new home!

Jace Bellewaters:(mumbled)What are you talking about? This place will never be our home.

Find the key.

Jace:What?

The key wiht a red crown.

Jace:Hello?

No answer

Jace:Hello?

Again, no answer.

Edgar:Who are you talking to?

Jace:No one. Go explore the apartment or something.

Sorry Jace, that one's mine.

Jace:Why?

(sternly)Because i'm the parent and i said so.

Edgar? Where are you?

HERE!

You need to get dressed up!

Jace:Why do we need to get dressed?

My new boss is taking us out to eat. You will be on your best behavior, young lady.

That's weird. Loads of plugs and no electricity.

Jace! Ready yet?

Jace:I have to fix my hair!

There's no time for that! We have to leave!

Jace: 12th grade, sir.

My, my. You are quite the young lady, then.

Yes sir. Six o'clock sounds great, Ok Mr. Wilkerson, i'll see you tonight.

Why are you meeting Mr.Wilkerson again? You just saw him last night.

It's none of your business. We have certain things to discuss about the job. You know, work hours and things like that. All you alright? You took quite a fall last night.

I'm alright, Mom.

So tonight, I'll need you to keep an eye on Edgar and Shadow.

Fine.

JACE FRANCINE BELLAWATERS! Where the heck have you been?! Strolling around , i suppose! You'll make me late, you know1

Jace: Well mom, you're wasting more time shouting than you are driving to...wherever you're going!

Jace, i don't have time for this and it's none of your business of where i go and why.

Jace:This is a date, isn't it?

Jace, you don't understand.

Jace: You don;t just have dinner with your children and your boss, go out with him again the very nextnight and not expect me to assume this.

It's not like that.

Jace: But it is! You think you can replace dad!

DON'T YOU DARE SAY HIS NAME UNDER THIS ROOF! Edgar is bathing and Shadow is asleep in his kennel. Supper is in the oven, take it out in exactly ten-

I got it. I know how to take care of myself. I'm sixteen. I'm not a child anymore, you know.

Where are the towels?

I don't know! Go find some and put some clothes on!

What took you so long?

We got a little carried away, that's all.

Sure.

The people still await their savior.

They await the one whose actions

will redeem the wickedness of

Queen Grimhilde, the evil ruler of Fayble.

The people wait, craving for

vengence. But, their wait is over.

One is soon coming that will carry out the prophecy from the scroll

of the Almost Dead, the prophecy that has been left unread for many centuries. The prophecy reads:

She will arrive in the humblest of ways, and

wear the answer,

or the end of our days.

To leave unscathed

a battle with the Queen,

with the crooked blade,

a victory this fight.

To win this war,

the cost to be brave,

there is a love, a lie,

a key and a grave.

Ok. Not your average Harry Potter. (reads the book)

(shouted)Edgar, put that down!

What's Fayble?

(shouted)Nothing! Just...give it back!

Mom?

What?

Do you miss dad?

Come and sit, Jace. David was...really interesting. He was one of those care free people. Didn't take life seriously, always living in the moment. I remember when we first met, I was skiing during the holidays in my second year of college. He was my ski instructor. He proposed to me on a hot air balloon. Yes, he was one to take risks, but i loved him. When we had you, it was just perfect. We both had great jobs, we were paying our bills, we had a nice house and we vacationed every year. Then, when we had Edgar, your dad just...let himself go. He jumped from job to job, started smoking and drinking, he wouldn't come back until the next morning. And then he got himself killed! I knew it was only a matter of time before something happened.

(yells)The food!

Hi there.

Wait, you can see me?

Yes. Sorry but i must ask who you are.

YIPPEE! The prophecy! You are her! It is absolutely an honor to meet you, your majesty. My name is Dulin. I am the Keeper of Keys to Worlds Far and Wide.

Wait, what do you mean i can see you? Can't anyone else?

Only the ones worthy enough can see me. Id anyone could we would have thousands of mortals lined up to get keys to Fayble.

So Fayble is real!

Yes and very much alive. I put a spell on my home so that it looked like a mortal bookshop. Complete with mortal workers! It took me a while, but it works.

And you called me your majesty. I'm hardly of royal blood.

But you are royalty The one true heir to Queen Grimhilde's throne! The one that will save us from her wrath and reign. Oh and what is your name?

Jace.

My dear Jace, you are destined to be the true queen of Fayble. For that, you will receive this. Take this key and save Fayble. When you do, i will be free to leave this place.

Where will you go?

Wherever you command me. The Keeper must remain where he or she is stationed until the next ruler gives him or her another station.

So, you're immortal?

Yes and no. I can't die, but when the ruler of Fayble wishes for a new Keeper, he or she appoints a new one and all of my years will come back at once. I would be turn into dust.

Well that sucked.

I know. That's why you must save me and all of Fayble. Now go, dear Jace. That trunk awaits you.

Thank you. If i defeat the queen, i promise to be very kind.

Bless you, your majesty. Goodbye and good luck.

HIYA JACE!

So, what did you do today, Jace?

Nothing special.

Jace, get in here now!

Where are you?

In my room!

Why is this unlocked? When i tried to open it last night, it was locked. Explain yourself.

I swear, i have no idea.

I'm going to bed.

Why this early?

My first day at work is tomorrow. I have to teach a class at seven in the morning. That means you're in charge of keeping an eye on Edgar and Shadow. Shadow has some medicine to take in the morning.

Suddenly, Jace began to wake up to see the dwarves staring at her then she began to scream.The dwarves screamed. Jace screamed. The dwarves screamed. Jace screamed. The seven dwarves finally looked at one another.

Did you bring her?

Dude like did you?

Yo bro. Dat crap wasn't me! Okay? So chill out! Okay?

't wasn't me!

Where done she come from?

:Did she follow us?

began to do his victory dance

Jace Bellewaters: Um... what is he doing?

:Oh, he's just excited because it was the first time that someone is in his bed.

Jace Bellewaters: What are you?

:We're Elves.

:You're not elves. Elves aren't three feet tall, they're usually closer to seven. The only short elves i've heard of only work for Father Christmas, but they wouldn't survive here, it's much too warm.

Prince Gerald Charming:Maybe we done off our coats, eh? Nevuurr done thought av that there, done y'all?

Prince Atticus Charming:Hey, lay it off. She knows we ain't no Elf punks. (turned to Jace, looking very apologetically) Sorry, about my younger brother's behavior.

Jace:So...I am Jace Bellewaters. May i ask your names?

Atticus:I am Atticus and these are my six brothers: Benno...

Benno stood and bowed graciously.

Benno: Delighted to make your acquaintance ma'am.

Atticus:Conrad...

Conrad:Ya gotta spittoon with ya?

Another

Dedrick:I'm Dedrick, Professional bookie. You want the point spread on the Raiders' game? I can get it...minimal charge.

Jace:No thanks.

Atticus:This is Edmund...

Edmund:Yo. Wha's goin' down bro?

Atticus:This is Franz...

Franz's eyes were glazed over and the tie dyed T-shirt he wore bore a slogan saying, :Pacifism is the light".

Franz: Dude...like your outfit and your hair is so unpolluted... it totally reflects your environmental views man... rock on.

Atticus: You'll have to forgive him. Franz is rather liberal and i don't think he has ever realized that the 60's ended forty years ago. We think it might be best not to tell him.

Jace:And who might you be?

The dwarf just smiled a huge dopey looking grin.

Atticus:Ah, that's Gunter... he doesn't speak.

Jace:Is there something wrong with him?

Benno: Fear not madame, tis not that a disease ails our youngest brother...tis that he has never attempted utilize his tongue.

Jace: Ooooookay...(mumbles) Fabulous. A head honcho, a Shakespearean, a hick, a bookie, a gangster, a hippie and a mute idiot. Boy was i in for a fun afternoon. Right.

(yells)CINDERELLA!

Oh crap! What did i forget this time?

The stepmother screeched from the dining room offscreen.

(muttered)What on earth did you do with these potato slices?

Cinderella moaned and scurried out to the dining room, where her two stepsisters were picking primly at their beef and cheese casserole. The stepmother was ramrod straight in her chair and had a murderous expression on her face. She is just about average height, 5'6. Long black hair that fell to her waist and her face was pale and pointy.

(in a dangerously level voice) These potato slices are charred and there aren't enough of them.

(shouted)Wait, there aren't enough?! I used the rest of the potatoes! I put them in the oven so they weren't touching each other, exactly like you said! They stayed in he oven for twenty minutes, just like you ordered! Seriously, what the heck could i have done wrong?!

(shouted)You're supposed to make twice this many, that's why they're burnt.

(angrily)What do you want me to do about it then?

(sighed impatiently)Well, it's a bit late for you to make more. But next time, there's no excuse.

(muttered as she turned toward the kitchen)I figured as much.

(threateningly)What was that, Cinderella?

Cinderella stopped in her tracks and cringed.

(mumbled as she dashed back to the kitchen)Yes, Miss Dorienne.

Once in the kitchen, she clenched both of her fists.

(whispers) Damn it. (shuffled over to the counter and started cleaning up the kitchen) I hate it when she does that.

CINDERELLA! WE'RE DONE EATING! GET THE DISHES!

Seriously? Why does she have to scream it every single time? Can't she just talk like a normal person?

You haven't even started the dishes yet? What on earth have you been doing?

I...uh... I was just... um...(gets slapped by Dorienne)

You are the most insolent, ungrateful, lazy, incompetent child i have ever encountered in my life! If i hadn't promised your father that i'd care for you, I would've turned you out years ago!

(muttered menacingly)You don't have to turn me out. You never freaking cared for me in the first place.

Cinderella!

Cinderella wakes up.

(grumbles)Why does she calls me by that stupid name? My name is Ella not Cinderella, geez.

CINDERELLA!

I'm awake, i'm awake!

Linda:(with a sneer)Ugh, don't you ever take a shower?

Yeah, whenever you freaks let me.

(sneered)What did you just say?

I said i can only take a shower whenever you freaks let me.

That's what i thought. (slaps her across the face)

(rubs her red, swollen cheek)Jeez, sorry.

Queen Grimhilde: I've had enough of this! (however nothing happened. She tried again, but nothing still happens) Oh screw it.

Queen Grimhilde pulls out a lighter from her dress and sets Pinocchio on fire. She then cackles as Pinocchio screams.

Pinocchio:(shouted)AAAAAHHHH! WHY? WHY WAS I TURNED INTO A TALKING PUPPET THAT IS MADE OUT OF WOOD BUT WITH NO STRINGS ATTRACTED TO ME?!

Jack Spriggins: (shouted)Don't worry! I'll save you!

:(screams)DO NOT THROW THAT FREAKING AXE! THAT NEVER SOLVES ANYTHING!

Jack Spriggins: Aw man.

Jace Bellewaters: I'll save you! (grabbed a bucket and doused Pinocchio in water. She also got water on Queen Grimhilde)

Queen Grimhilde:(screams in horror as she clutched onto her face)AAAAAAAAAHHHH! NOOOOO! MY MAKEUP IS MELTING!! MELTING!! OH WHAT A WORLD!

Queen Grimhilde then reveals to everyone her face. Her makeup was indeed running.

Everyone: (gasps in terror) GAH!

Queen Grimhilde: (shouted)LOOK WHAT YOU DID! NOW EVERYONE CAN SEE MY 40 SOMETHING YEAR OLD FACIAL BLEMISHES!

Jace Bellewaters: I didn't mean to! Really i didn't! It's...it's just that he was on fire!

Queen Grimhilde: That's it! No more games! I'm gonna finish you off once and for all!

Prince Atticus Charming:Don't do this.

Jace Bellewaters: Take care of everyone, please Atticus. Make sure they're safe. Keep them safe.

Prince Atticus Charming: No, we can fix this. We have to try, at least. You can't just give yourself up to her!

Jace Bellewaters: We couldn't win. I have to do this. Atticus, I- Take care of yourself too.

Should i say something...funny?

No.

Yeah i thought so.

(crying)So sad... hey look! A penny!

Trivia

A Witch's Fairytale is inspired by Shrek, Bratz Kidz Fairy Tales, Ella Enchanted Hoodwinked! and Happily N'ever After and Into the Woods.