Before the Nightmare

Brain Swap is the second episode of Star Guardians Unite!

 Summary 

As a teenaged superhero, one finds themselves in a lot of really weird situations.What happens if a villain came to Goldmoor and his magic goes haywire and being inside someone else's body is probably the worst?

 Quotes 
 * Sandra Rowen: I'll just eat a bit and i'll be on my way to find Zeke's parents!

Hey Beam Boy! Will you give me an autograph?

Sandra:Sure thing little buddy!

You don't sound like Beam Boy.

Sandra:I-I...got my tonsils removed! Yeah...That's why i sound like this!
 * Jan:Guys, i have made a pudding full of switched-ness! Who wants to try it?

Sandra:Sure!

Sandra:Uh oh.

Jan:What's wrong Sandra? You don't like it?

Sandra:This can't be happening! Tell me it's not happening!

Maya:(sarcastically)It's not happening.

Sandra:Oh God! It's happening!
 * Sandra:I CAN'T MAKE POOPIE! NOOOOOOOOOO!

Trent McGuire: Dude, since when were you the leader of this team? We don't need to follow you! You're just the wannabe sidekick of that dude with his underwear outside of his clothes!
 * Hunter Jonas: Star Guardians Unite!

Hunter Jonas: You take that back! Superman was like a father to me!

Julie Jonas: Hunter, our so called father was batman.

Hunter Jonas: Oh. I mean...Batman was like a father to me!

Sandra:I can't poop Ezekiel! I hate you!

Ezekiel:It's not my fault! Blame my parents who made me!

Sandra:Who made you then?

Ezekiel:How the heck should i know!

Sandra:Duh! Because they created you!

Ezekiel:I don't know who brought me to this world, okay!

Maya:So your parents gave you no hole instead of a poop hole and you're saying that you had to suffer all your life constipated. (sarcastically) Your parents must really love you.

Sandra:Shut up Maya! We don't need your sarcasm here!

Ezekiel:Well, we don't need to hear your stupid pooping problems either.

Sandra:Fine!

Ezekiel:Fine!

Sandra:Anyway! I must go on a mission to find the parents of Zeke and make them fix this problem!

President Bush:Yeah! And cause war with them!

Maya:(sarcastically)No wonder they made you president. You're a freaking genius.

Sandra Rowen:I shall go now! Off to find Ezekiel's parents. Lisa Sato:(angrily)You try living with a brain that goes as fast as mine for one day, Maya. I dare you and i swear you'll talk ten times as much as i do! If you want to criticize someone, then maybe you should point to yourself! Wendy floats lazily over Tanya.
 * Maya Martinez:You're such a blabbermouth! Just shut your trap for once!
 * Tanya Martinez:Can we just focus on the problem? I don't like this. I'm tiny.

Wendy Lee:Hey, being small has its advantages. Not all of us can be a hulking mass of electricity.
 * Trent McGuire:How the heck do you deal with all this hair? And this! They're so freaking heavy! How do you not have any back problems?!

Vanessa:Ugh. Just don't look down at my body.
 * That's it, I'm taking a shower and that's final!

(playfully)And if i do?

Vanessa:Then i will beat you with a flaming stick spawned from the inner depths of the underworld until your eyes pop out of your eye socket and until your brain oozes out of your mouth. Then i will gladly beat the living crap out of you with a medieval flail, stick it up your butt and enjoy it immensely.

O-okay. (mentally) She is so morbid...Cool.

...
 * HOOOOOOLLLLYYYYYY CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP! Don't you just wanna see what happened?

You hate me right now, don't you?

Sandra Rowen: I know what it's like to have a rough childhood. Right now, it's just me, Paul and mom... but it wasn't always like that. Back at Whitehorse,Yukon, Our dad was a part of our early lives. (Vanessa looks amazed at this information as Sandra keeps talking)As we got older, his face slowly fades from our minds. I can vaguely remember how he looks like. He likes to wear tie dye shirts, i think. Let's just say that the father of the year award goes to anyone but him. He left when i was only six and Paul was only five.He told our mom that he didn't love and care about her anymore and the next thing you know it... he was gone. Mom wasn't herself after that and Paul was devastated but he was too young to likely understand what was really going on and me...well, i don't think my feelings were ever there in the first place. Whenever me and Paul had trouble with something, dad would mumble his snide remarks about us behind our backs to mom. I was young back then, so i didn't understand what he meant. But honestly, his remarks never bothered us...but his actions did. It was hard not to have a father to protect you from the bad things in this world. One year later after dad left us, mom decided that it would be best for the three of us to move to the United States because she thought it would be a good place to raise us and to start a new life... an American life, despite us not having a lot of money. Two years later, i found out from a friend from Gatineau, Quebec, that the reason why he left us is so he could end up chasing after some woman. He's been dating that woman and has been cheating on my mom ever since my brother was born.

Vanessa Black: What would you do if you ever see him again?

Sandra Rowen: I doubt that i'd want to anyway. Sorry for talking your ear off. You must be sick of me rambling about my life story.

Vanessa smiled and shook her head.

Vanessa Black: Not at all. I really appreciate you telling me all those things. I can tell you needed to talk to someone about that, and i'm humbled to be that someone.

Sandra Rowen: (smiled) Thanks for listening and for being a real friend.

Vanessa Black: (smirked) No problem.

Script

Hunter Jonas: (panicked) This can't be happening!This can't be real! I-It's a dream! That's right! It's all a really bad dream! Any moment now, I should be waking up in my nice cozy bed...or as a chicken, which has to be better than this. (stands there grinning for a moment)Oh my god! This isn't a dream! AT LEAST LET ME WAKE UP AS A CHICKEN! SHOW ME MERCY,GOD!

Indira Cooper: Come on! I knew you hated me, but this is ridiculous!

Hunter Jonas: Indira, it's not that! Well it is, but only partially, but i'm in your body! You are in my body! Now put two and two together.

Indira Cooper:...I'm sorry, what was the question?

Hunter Jonas: (sarcastically) Once again, Darwinism fails and i have to suffer for it.

Ladies, sit down.

Well neither was it for you to be born, but i guess some freak accidents are bound to happen.

shouted I'll make a freak accident out of you!

Yep, they switched bodies, but do you know how it happened?

As a matter of fact, i did.

Indira Cooper:

Hunter Jonas: That my friend is a ball, and no, they did

Indira Cooper: I know it wasn't invented this morning! Nobody said anything about it on the news. It's just that it's just so weird looking.

Hunter Jonas: (sarcastically)Try dropping it on the floor, it does this amazing thing you probably never heard of called bouncing.

Indira Cooper: You know what? I'm pretty sick of you undermining me, you're always acting like i'm some kind of idiot!

Hunter Jonas: (sarcastically)Yeah, well somebody has to have a brain around here and be a female, and i don't see it being you anytime soon.

Indira Cooper: Well this girl doesn't pay her taxes!

Hunter Jonas: This girl laughs whenever somebody says "fire retardant"!

Indira Cooper: Her boyfriend is from an alternate universe and 1) He can grow weapons and machines from his body and 2) He can cure E.V.Os.

Hunter Jonas: Her IQ is slower than a rapper's pants and that would be quite a feat consider her low intellect!

Indira Cooper: Her sister's boyfriend's a Canadian!

Hunter Jonas: She spells fork with a 4!

Melanie Cooper: Guys,please! You shouldn't be fighting!

Indira Cooper: My cousin's right! We shouldn't be fighting!

Hunter Jonas: We are so screwed...

Hunter Jonas: This sucks! Did you know it took me seven hours just to get the smell of cheese out?

Julie Jonas: I don't believe it, my sister is now Indira! This is the worst thing to ever happen to me!

Maya Martinez: Let me get this straight, You and Indira are each other, now.

Indira Cooper: Yeah, that pretty much it.

Maya Martinez: I don't believe it. Let me see something. (opens up a candy bar and drops it on the floor. Antonio and Indira dive after it but knocks their heads together and knock each other out)I'm seeing it, but i don't believe it.

Sandra Rowen: Man this is the weirdest thing to happen to you guys.

Vanessa Black:Hunter, i'm glad you had a father even though he died in a car crash. Before i met my biological father, I was raised in Birmingham, Alabama at an orphanage.Few years later, i was taken in by my biological maternal uncle who only use me for the foster care money the state pays. He would speak to me when it was completely necessary. My birth parents, whom i've never seen and met, at one point i thought they might be dead, but my uncle told me to stop being such a fool. I was hit over the head and told not to ask about them again. There are times when my uncle would either locked me in my room or a closet before he go off in his car, at the time i had no idea where he was going because he would usually be gone for almost 7 weeks and sometimes 5 months, leaving me alone without food, water and heat.

Hunter Jonas: You mean your uncle never did anything?

Vanessa Black: (lets out a bitter hiss of disdain)Darn straight he didn't.He never taught me how to walk, he never took me to the doctor whenever i felt sick, he never taught me how to talk, he never taught me how to read...Heck, he didn't even teach me how to tie shoes! The mailman did! The.Mail.MAN! I tried telling about the abuse, but no one back in the neighborhood believed me. The abuse just got worse after every time i told. One day, he kicked me out and looked at me with such disgust and bitterness and he said...he said that the reason why he always hated me is because i was the reason why my mom is dead.

Sandra Rowen: I know what it's like to not have a certain family member to be there for you and care about you?

Vanessa Black: What do you mean? He even says that I was an accident, a mistake that have never been born in my family's eyes.

Sandra Rowen: I'll tell you later?

Hunter Jonas:Somebody's got to run the auto shop.

Julie Jonas:Auto Shop? You can't go there!

Hunter Jonas:Why not?

Antonio Martinez:Because you're not you, Indira Cooper doesn't run Jonas's Auto!

Hunter Jonas: But Indira doesn't work at Jonas's Auto! She'll ruin everything!

Indira Cooper:C'mon, have faith in me, It'll be just like when you run the place.

Hunter Jonas: You better be right.

Indira Cooper:C'mon! How hard can it be to fix cars? (Julie, Maya and Antonio then chuckles) What?

Sandra Rowen: Oh nothing... it's just...You suck at being a repairwoman. You can't even fix yourself a sandwich.

At the Cooper residence, Hunter is inside Indira's bedroom, reading a book. Suddenly, Indira's mother, Debbie Cooper, burst into the room.

Debbie Cooper: (shouted)INDIRA, CUT IT OUT!

Hunter Jonas: Cut what out?

Debbie Cooper: Whatever it is you're doing! You're supposed to be studying!

Hunter Jonas: But i am studying.

Debbie Cooper:What?!Alright? Indira, what meds are you on?

Hunter Jonas: None, i'm just studying, i 'd also like to make a complaint. I found thousands of inappropriate websites and pictures, a bunch of spyware, malware, and viruses, and bookmarks to worthless ads leading to said spyware. I'd like to know who did this stupidity to my computer.

End Episode

Voice Cast

Elizabeth Gillies- Hunter Jonas/Cursechanter

Ariel Winter- Julie Jonas/ManaStar

Kate Micucci- Indira Cooper/StoneSun

Abigail Breslin- Vanessa Black

Jennette McCurdy- Robby Gooden/Venus

Drake Bell- Ezekiel Sanders/ Beam Boy

Christine Marie Cabanos-Melanie Cooper

Becky G- Maya Martinez/ Plasma Girl

Keshia Chante- Tanya Martinez/ Voltage

Carlos PenaVega- Antonio Martinez/ Elastic Amigo

Sabrina Carpenter- Sandra Rowen/Stormwind

Michael Cera- Paul Rowen/ Zephyr

Sophie Oda- Lisa Sato/Velocity

Brenda Song-Wendy Lee/Sandstorm

Jerry Trainor- Trent McGuire/LightMan

 Trivia 
 * Star Guardians Unite! shares the same universe with Generator Rex, The Life and Times of Juniper Lee and Ben 10.
 * Sandra,Paul and Samantha are Canadian Americans and Paul and Sandra used to have a dad who hates the two and later abandons the family to run off with another woman.
 * Though their mother, Tanya, Maya and Antonio are biologically related to Ophelia Ramirez (The Life and Times of Juniper Lee).
 * Hunter and Julie are biologically related to Roger Radcliffe (The Life and Times of Juniper Lee).